The better you look.
And it's not that I don't know all my friends and family look at me and think.."your 92 lbs..you don't need to suck in your stomach.."
and oh how they worry
oh how they fear,
but I'm not done yet, i never will be.
I CAN BE THINNER
how many times a day do the cars that drive by whistle? It seems the smaller I get, the more they multiply, feed my ego now! feed it! Give me reasons, reasons to do this,
I must be becoming beautiful,
I must be becoming worth something!
Without drugs, I have to do this alone.
I have to strive to be thin,
I go to work with my knees trembling and my head spinning,
I can do it,
I can be better...
I just know this makes me sicker.
And sometimes I wish it would stop...Ana would be silenced, to block it out and sit down to a meal and eat without the pain, guilt, disappointment,
but I know that can never be.